So I guess lets catch up, I am in my last year of school, Nurse Channing is on her way. It has been such a awesome experience. I have wanted to quit this last year, but anyone who knows me knows I will show them who is boss. I put on my big girl panties and hit the books and decided I don't need a social life. I am so happy lately, something has changed in me. I have found a lot of happiness by searching for it and finally enjoying little things in life. I also found a person who is amazing, and really makes me laugh all the time. I mean not just a little ha ha, a full on throw my head back, laugh so hard I cant breath type of laugh. (I know you can all picture it). I am not implying anything, but I finally know what I have in my life and its so amazing to share it with someone who thinks the same.
I am not writing this to tell you I have a BF or that I am going to get married (Cause that is not true) but I am going to tell you that I found a best friend in a place that I thought I never would. Serving (and completed) a mission in this area over 8 months ago, and baptized my friend Chantel, and completed his mission and since he has been home we have talked constantly. Which is weird, cause lets be honest I just got done telling you I have no time for anything, but I do have time to talk to him. He pushes me, he makes me want to beat him in everything, he makes me want to be a better me, he dishes out compliments like it is his job, never lets me give him one with out giving one back. It just makes me smile to know that sharing the gospel brought him into my life, a act of service, brought me someone who I truly cherish. I got to see his dedication while he served, and I look back and I amazed.
I also with in my busy schedule signed up for two classes of institute and one of which is a marriage class (insert laugh here), but if i can be completely honest, it is AMAZING. There is a lot of things that are misunderstood or just plain old not understood that can been answered in this class. I attend it with one of my BESTIES- Kelsey. I love attending this class with her, she and I feed off each other and I know we have both taught each other a lot. Both in school and testimony. After all what do you rely on when everything else seems to be falling apart? I know who I turn to, not just in times of trials but in my times of happiness. I know at this point in my life the big M word is what I am supposed to be working for and I know this. I am not saying I know 10000 of men who want to marry me, but I needed to find out who I am, and I say that cause I put a lot into a relationship prior and lost it. So I needed to go on dates and date people in which I don't fall for but at-least I would be able to find out what I am looking for, cause how do you find it when you are completely lost. So this last year has helped me grow so much, and love who I am and I know I can do anything. I guess once you find it in you to believe in yourself, you will find others who believe in you too. Just have to get up and find out who you are and others will too.
A little quote I like to keep in my head is you will never find anyone who is a 100% right for you, you will find some one who will do. (this sounds like it is harsh,or that it doesn't believe in love, but read it again. it is true, no one is 100% made for you, there is always , "but they will do"). I found it hard to process at first but then I found out there is give and take (you cant like everything about the other person) and if I think the perfect man is coming along, I am wrong. I want the person who is my best friend, who knows what I am like at my worst, best, and stressed, this person can then sit down beside me and support me instead feeling like they have never seen this side of me.
Didn't mean for this post to be so long and unorganized but now at least you can have a little taste of what my head is like.
